This serves as an addendum to “In Every Work Bag,” a tribute to an incredible woman who continues to leave her mark. Rest in peace, my friend.
The significance of Claire Williams is too great to explain. Ms. Williams helped me understand talent, drive, or intellect would not be substance enough, I would need a lot of grace and support.
The story that I told early in this series of letters, I rarely shared with people around me over the years. It was too painful to discuss and too complex to explain; I would just tell them that I was working to move forward. Over the next decade, every job had a moment similar to the “make or break” one detailed in the letter to Claire. Someone would reach out to my employer in disgust; it would be an anonymous white knight, a former friend, a contentious former relationship, or a professional rival. The last decade or so could best be described as a perpetual state of tortious interference. At each stop, my business relationships were impacted. I lost, perhaps, my most meaningful job this way.
But the majority of my employers responded the way that Claire would have. They would say something along the lines of “He’s one of us.” On three occasions, I was made to stand before the company and make my case to all of the employees. While each instance was demoralizing, it was better than being fired so I was glad to do it. I saw Claire in founders like Wil, Elliot, Eric, Ben, Kevin, Jennifer, Larry, Michelle, Jay, Nate, Jeremy, and Lisa.
But ultimately, I decided after my last bout of employment in 2018 that I would no longer put an employer in that position again. So I chose to work for myself and take the chances associated with self-employment.
I started 2PM Inc. as a hobby in 2016 but I went all-in on it as a business in 2018 after falling nearly $70,000 in medical debt after a reconstructive surgery on my right leg. For the company’s first two years, things went rather smoothly. Hundreds of newsletters were emailed successfully, we successfully partnered with a number of great consulting clients, and - with the help of the team of six - we invested in 28 companies. But in late 2020, two things changed. By August of 2020, I began opening up about my personal trauma associated with my Academy experience. While dozens of people in my industry had spoken to me about it over the years, my conversations with one or two of those who were closest to me was a new level of confrontation of the past and a new level of trust that I placed into people. But by November, I seemingly ruined that relationship. That same month, I nearly had a podcast appearance pulled because of chatter about the Academy court-martial from 2006.
December 2020 was the first time that it was hinted that reporters wanted to dig into my life to find a way to revisit the Academy court-martial. The first instance was a tweet that I stumbled upon of a screenshot from a New York reporter with my name blacked out. Then in March 2021, I was told by someone that was closest to me that they were contacted about it. In June 2021, I was told the same. And in November 2021, I was told the same. Over this time period, industry friends that I cared about began to shut me out, one by one. Some would answer as to why they wanted nothing to do with me, some wouldn’t answer at all.
This past year was one of the many years that I lost far more than I gained. Still, I wasn’t ready to confront much of what you’ve read in Addendum No. 1. I lost relationships that mattered greatly to me. My mental health broke between those two Decembers. And for the first time in a decade, I was outwardly harassed by strangers, online and otherwise.
My demeanor suffered, I was short, callous, and often awful to those closest to me. So much so that as a result, two of my best friends are no longer in my life. One was was written about here (he responded with grace). But the other, well, I doubt she’d respond.
What was clear was that, this time, I had no Claire.